Chicken Nugget Central

For those who have experienced laughing alone at Kuwait cinema.

Tuesday, December 13, 2005

Meet, as in endure?

So I had been complaining to my recently married best friend about my mother's incessant nagging about me getting married. So she suggested I meet an old friend of hers. She gave me details and said:

Her: "Miya he is perfect for you, he is so open minded and easy going. But he is short"
Me: "Is he ugly? Is he fit?"
Her: "No he has a nice face and a fit body"
Me: "Sounds good, ok I will meet him"

That is how it started. When I said "meet him" I met as in casual hello while me and her were out shopping or something. So the day comes and I wear black pants and a white cardigan. My friends walks into my room decked to the nines and starts freaking out on me. She then proceeds to primp me out in a slutty but conservative suit (think sexy secretary), and paints my face with all colors of the rainbow. All the while I was thinking to myself, this better be worth it!

So we get to the coffee shop and he shows up. Within 5 seconds I was already regretting agreeing to it. I mean the warning sign of "IF HE WASN'T GOOD ENOUGH FOR HER" was scrolling across my mind along with "TOLD YOU SO!".

My friend excused herself and he started a tirade of how much of a shitty person he is. Including details about how he has had lots of women, and he means LOTS of women, to how he likes to drink and gamble. I think he thought that I would have a problem with it and when he saw that I was like "yeah ok, so?" He just kept stressing it more and more. Along with how he wants to tell me the negatives before the positives. Actually, I think he is more turned off by himself than I was.

Anyways, I came away from the 10 minute, turned 1 hour meeting with:

1- He does NOT have a nice face.
2- He is not only short but has a MOUSY body too.
3- He reminded me of some-one yucky. I later remebered who!! My dad's SLEAZY friend who always grabs and kisses me in salutation, but only when his wife is not around! EWWW!!
4- He has REALLY small hands.

So while we had a lot in common, we even go to the same gym, salsa dance etc. I would only be friends with the guy not more.
I have also re-ranked my 'best friend' to 'friend'. So there is a free spot as my 'best friend' available for those interested.

P.S. I chose to write about this here, since any other person I tell this to will ask for a name, and I cannot diss a person then say who the person is. That is just unclassy and I am a classy lady :)


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